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June 6, 2007
stresssssss
As I sit here with mere hours to go, unpacked, still designing, and still procrastinating by doing such things as blogging and photographing my wall of coffee (visual proof of my state of mind)...
I reflect on the memory of every pre-trip being exactly the same. I remember moving to London in 2000 and sitting amongst a pile of boxes I had just moved home, finding what I needed amongst old diaries and cutlery, I distinctly recall the words of my head shaking, arms crossed mother... "Why on earth do you leave things til the last minute and end up in this ridiculous chaos!" and here I am, 7 years later, but mum can't see me.. harhar!
So I only have my self to reprimand me.
I noticed just before as my workflow was easing up and it looked like an end was in sight that a glimmer of disappointment hit me. What!? It dawned on me that I was actually enjoying this state of stress, this multi coffeeed high, the increased heart rate and dehydration, that in fact I found it fun, and that I didn't really want to go home with time to relax and pack.
So I am addicted to the stress. And I make it worse (ie better) by consuming sugar and caffeine and saying 'yes' to more than I can manage.
I'm a work-slut! oh my god....
This is just a very immediate realisation and one I now plan to beat out of myself with meditation and some om shantis.
[current mood] All things High
Posted by nat at June 6, 2007 1:46 PM
Comments
i'm exactly the same thing. i thrive off of being unorganized and i get things done at the last minute. i used to feel so guilty about it, but hey it works for me.
btw, found your site via karen cheng's blog. enjoyed reading your posts. will visit again for sure.
here's to your new life in a new city!
~odessa
Posted by: odessa at June 14, 2007 4:35 PM
